To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift.
-Steve Prefontaine
Make it simple, but significant.
- Don Draper

Friday, June 15, 2012

Pure Imagination? Or Rum?

Come with me
And you'll be
In a world of
Pure imagination
Take a look
And you'll see
Into your imagination

So maybe it wasn't exactly like going into Willy Wonka's chocolate factory - but for a girl that doesn't eat any candy or chocolate, it was pretty nice!

When work was over I went out to my mom's house where we gazed at her gigantic new fish (she has a pretty cool Koi pond) and looked at the new orange and black flag pole they just put up. But what we were really meeting for was the food! We piled into my mom's car and made the very short drive around the corner to the Country Club for the kick off party for the big Abby's Golf Tournament weekend. Pizza, oysters, chicken on a stick, salmon, cheese, crackers, veggies, fruit, desserts, and an open bar. Let me repeat .... an open bar.

Seeing as I deliberately ran my 4 miles in the morning so that I could make it to this dinner, and seeing as I didn't have to run on Friday I figured sure, I'll have a rum and Coke, why not?!? I nursed that little guy for quite a while. When my mom went back for another round (from that open bar!) I said Sure, why not!?! My step-dad disappeared in the middle of his dinner. Eventually I found him at the head of the drink line. Before I knew it he was back .... and I had yet another rum and Coke - which technically was Pepsi, yay! My drinks just kept multiplying and getting bigger as the night went on!

My quest for a tummy full of food was more difficult. I wanted pizza. I mean it is the sponsor of the whole weekend after all, and a very popular local favorite! I say it every year, and I stand by it ... Abby's HATES vegetarians. So many times they said "Oh, we have 3 vegetarian pizzas cooking." Really? Did you then forget to bring them out? My mom and I stalked every food area and never found one that wasn't covered in some sort of animal. And then it happened. I saw a fresh pizza come out. I went up to investigate. That pizza was being hovered over by yours truly and "the vegans". Between the 3 of us I bet we took half of that giant pizza! Three small slices of Greek pizza were happily in my belly!!

Then it was time for dessert! I mentioned yesterday they have a room completely full of desserts. I thought this year's looked a little smaller than last year, but whatever, it smelled glorious! You walk in and it just a sea of cakes, pies, cookies and fruit. I ended up with a slice of cheese cake and my own apple pie. On the way out I checked it out again. I may have borrowed a plate and fork from the Country Club and ate my mango cake in the car. So good!!

As far as the gossip .... a former cheerleader that gave me the stink eye last year for no reason? Yeah, she got even fatter. I hardly recognized her. So yeah - she can keep her stink eye to herself I think. Was that bitchy? Yeah - but was she bitchy to me for years? YES! Karma, bitch. I saw a guy I graduated with and his date? I had to verify that it wasn't his kid sister. It saddens me that I am now old enough to date someone inappropriately too young for me. I saw a lot of my family which is always nice. And my 10th grade Wellness teacher came up to me and said in my ear, "Penis penis penis penis times 8." Yes, true story. And when she left our table for the night she said, "Good by, R0nda Penis Head." Gotta love the Country Club!!


  1. It sounds like you had an amazing time!!! WAHOO!!!

    And yes, there is nothing like the sweet karma of having a royal bitch get fat. It is the stuff dreams are made of.

    1. Sweet dreams are made of this, who am I to disagree??

  2. What is the penis story, because I feel there is more to it, and it might be funny! (Or i just drank 2 margs and penis is one of my favorite words....after poop) (no seriously...say poop. Its funny to say) (did you say it??)(ok, im just going to have another marg)

    1. PENIS!!!

      The story has been posted!


  3. I agree...I think we need to hear the penis story. I just took a bunch of pictures of penis candy that was being passed around our office. Maybe I should blog about it... ;)

    1. I think you should blog it! I am very curious now as to why this was circulating at work!!

  4. This post makes me hungry.

    1. Let's have Disney pizza together in September to satisfy our joint hunger!


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