Thursday, August 30, 2012

Run 1.58 - The Mental Game

Fine - I was toying with skipping a run. I DID skip Tuesday's run because frankly I needed the recovery from the 22 miler and the 35 mile week - my highest yet. When MF said that even after getting his foot run over the night before he still went out and did 6 miles, well how do I not run?? So 6 miles it was.

I ran in capris for the first time in months, it was nice! And I wore my "heavy" Nike shoes as well. I haven't had them on in a while. I was typically wearing those for mid-week runs and my light shoes on the long weekend runs. This is boring, why am I babbling? Okay, so I ran and made a nice big circle and a half through my park area. The last mile had me going up two hills - and I am so happy to say I pretty much maintained the same pace for them. I mean I did these 6 miles in 1 hour and 2 minutes. For me that is pretty damn fast!

Part of my speed came from my mind and being scared. It wasn't really a pretty run, to be honest. Without saying details, let's just say I am physically terrified of someone to the point where I shut down and/or start shaking. Earlier I had to be escorted to my vehicle because I didn't want to be alone in the dark with this person near. As I was running and coming up on the "Blair Witch Forest" I kept thinking about all the things that led to me unsafe feeling and I think I just started having a panic attack. I wasn't even 3 miles into the run and wasn't sure I'd finish out the 6. But I didn't give up. I battled my mind, I constantly checked my surroundings and I finished out that run feeling pretty strong!

I guess it was good to know that when my mind turns on me I CAN power through. This run really made me appreciate my darling Man Friend. I have improved so much just since we started running together. I like that we hold each other accountable and push each other when we are starting to struggle. Running alone also made me realize that I am more relaxed with MF next to me. I mean I have someone there that has survived multiple deployments to multiple wars and is bigger and stronger than me. When we run together I'm not constantly looking at everyone like they are a murderer..... I'm so ready for his night schedule to be over next week so I can just get back to the fun, relaxed running that I was getting so used to!

I'm scheduled for more running tonight. I'm still deciding how far I'll go since I still haven't packed for Vegas and HAVE to tonight. By 9am Saturday morning I will be on the ground, listening to the sound of the machines, people watching and searching for my first of many fruity beverages!

So what about you? Any fun plans for this long weekend? And what about running? Have you had moments where you didn't feel safe (running or in general)? Any tips??


2 comments:

  1. Oh man, I'm sorry someone is making you feel so unsafe/scared. But good for you for powering through!! Enjoy fruity drinks and Vegas!!

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    Replies
    1. Cheers!! I WILL enjoy my drinks -- heck, I'll be nice and have one in your honor! ;)

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