Dilemma: Running With The Invisible Illness

This is the current status of my life:

Ever since I started running I have wanted to do the Holiday Half Marathon in Portland. It just never worked into my schedule. This year a fellow member of Lady Storm Squad suggested the race. I couldn't pass it up! That race is on Sunday. It is Friday evening now.

Back up to last Sunday. 10 miles on my training plan. I woke up with enough vertigo that I didn't feel safe running 10 miles away from home. We went to my mom's house to load up her treadmill so I could borrow it and try to get in my miles. I ran 3.

Monday I felt pretty alright, but time got away from me and I never ran.

Then Tuesday happened.

Life since Tuesday is all a blur. I feel like I've lost days.

Extreme vertigo. Daily migraines. Terrible nausea. Rushing to the bathroom at work so I don't throw up at my desk (I got lucky, never did lose my breakfast!). Sunglasses at work because I don't even want my eyes open. Brain fog. Intense, full ears that make me want to cry. Difficulty speaking. Unable to walk without my cane. The slowest walking EVER just because it is all I can manage. (It took me ten minutes to get from my desk to my car. This is probably 8 minutes or more slower than normal.) The floor moving all around like the psychedelic Circus Circus scenes in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. 

If I am lying down it doesn't hurt AS bad, but it is all still there. I can sit up for maybe 20 minutes if I'm lucky, and then I have to lay down again. I haven't been able to even fix my own food or food for my baby. Heck, even eating is hard. Forget about driving. I had to get picked up from work twice this week. Two days I couldn't even last my whopping 4 hours at work before having to go home.

But yeah, remember what is happening? The race.

To everyone that sees me I don't look sick. I don't have a cold. I don't have the flu. There isn't anything about me that would tell you I have an annoying invisible illness. I just get to suffer with Meniere's Disease, and apparently this week is going to be the absolute worst I have had in the 15 years I've been dealing with it.

And now I have to figure out what to do. The runner in me wants to run so darn bad. 

The current plan -- go to Portland tomorrow. Get my bib and shirt. And then I will decide do I run 13.1? Do I downgrade to 10k? Do I downgrade all the way to 5k? Do I skip it all together and instead show up to cheer on my friends and give them their bibs so they can have fun running and then just plan on next year instead?

I DON'T KNOW!!

This sucks.

Whining done. For now.