Monday, April 29, 2013

All Wedding Things Are Done!!

I am exhausted! Exhausted is an understatement I think.

Friday night was the bridal shower. My mom thought it would go for two hours. Ha!! More like four hours....with rum occasionally straight from the bottle!

Saturday morning I was up before 7 and decorating for the reception. Then it was non stop everything. I never sat down except for during the groom's very short speech.

At midnight I was in bed eating mac and cheese. Before 7, I was up again to clean. I didn't know an impromptu brunch type thing would happen later. And then MF's kids came to hang with us..... I was a zombie and therefore a terrible hostess. Dammit.

We passed out around 4pm then eventually woke up to open presents. Our guests were far too kind. I feel really lucky to have such great friends and family!

Now that it's all said and done I plan on doing legit posts. For now I'll share the new family photo....MF's son, yours truly, MF and his daughter (also a Rae girl like me!)


Thursday, April 25, 2013

FU, K

And here's the story of my gorgeous wedding ring. . .

MF picked out quite a rock, a Leo Diamond, and had it put with a band and setting he liked. Absolutely beautiful! The inside of the band was engraved saying it was a Leo Diamond, complete with an additional diamond. Sadly it was too big so we had it sized down.

When the ring came back, which took forever, it was the right size. It also had a scratch on the side and was missing the inside diamond. Part of the engraving was still a little visible. Fine, we will fix it when we add wedding bands we thought.

Together we pick out two bands to go on each side of my engagement ring. I found a band I LOVED in the store. MF ordered its twin so each band would be the same. Duh.  At Christmas when I opened up my present I noticed the bands didn't match. It was over a month of trying to get twins when we had to give up and take a slight alternate.

A month before the wedding we took them all in to be sautered together. I am not in the jewelry business. It didn't cross my mind that they should see if the size would stay the same when three rings became one. Apparently it never crossed their mind either. So the three bands were sent off on their merry way.

It's even better in person! - the ring, not my finger.
Soon I had my new ring!! I put it on....and my finger turned purple. We couldn't get it off of my finger. Oh. No. They told me not to worry. My finger was measured and it was shipped off again to be adjusted. Turns out it did need sized since the bands take up my whole finger area now. Also of note, the scratch was repaired....the engraving and inside diamond? Gone. Something about copyrights and blah blah blah.


A short while later my ring was ready! The wedding was close and I was relieved to have it back in time. I slid it on in the store and it was stuck. I decided to roll with it and worry about sizing when I got home. I was able to get the ring off with soapy water and wasn't stressed.


During my wedding, which was just perfect for us, we couldn't get it on. (That's what she said.) It created some humor at least! My finger was purple until I got it all the way on. Once on, it didn't budge. Not even a slight rotation. My fingers were poofy, thanks to heat and constant rum. It hurt. Nothing worked to loosened it up. I was finally able to get it off when we got home to Oregon and the result was rather disgusting!!

The very next day we took in my ring to be sized one last time. I showed them the photo of my finger and horror came across the faces of every employee. My ring was measured to see what size it was....instead of making it bigger they shrunk it!!! No wonder!!!

Apologies were flying our way and they assured us it would rapidly be fixed. I was told it would be back today, in time for my bridal shower and reception. I've been so excited for today. MF went to retrieve it.....they forgot to send it. It's done but the repair shop forgot to mail it back. Really??

So now they say Monday. I'm not holding my breath. I'm also not shopping at Kay Jewelers ever again!

My Most Favorite Photo

I'm a terrible blogger lately. I'm a terrible runner. I'm an excellent planner of receptions and teacher of dance moves!

Friday night is my bridal shower, yeah, a little out of order. Then Saturday is my official wedding reception (although the Vegas one was freaking awesome!!!). After wedding things I will try to resume normalcy. I am itching to run! I'm missing blog posting and reading. I'm ready to be free of decorations taking over my house.

In the mean time.... Here's my most favorite of all my wedding photos!


Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Las Vegas ~ Bachelorette Style


Four days in fabulous Las Vegas, countless pina coladas, dancing, singing, good food, and that little tiny event called my WEDDING!!! How on earth does one try to sum that up in a single blog? Yeah, you don't. So where does one start? Well, clearly you can't just have a wedding. You have to have the build up! I'm choosing to not go in order, and instead to start with the most epic of Vegas days ever..... the Bachelorette Party!
 

Saturday morning I met up at Planet Hollywood (my resort) with the Excalibur ladies at 9am for a nice stroll to the Showgirl Bar, all the time looking for any place serving alcohol that we could sip on before our class. What class was it? Stripper 101!
 
Sadly one member of our group couldn't join us, so instead we were a group of 9. Nine ladies clueless as to the hilarity that this 90 minute class would end up creating. Hilarity that would carry through the trip, even showing up during my wedding. I repeat DURING MY WEDDING!! My mom and I were so excited to finally see each other in Las Vegas, and quickly we bellied up to a bar for strawberry margaritas, i.e. liquid courage. For a while it was just six of us, and we all took the opportunity to get some photos under the stripper's legs. (See photo) Imagine being the bride, wearing a Bachelorette sash from her two new most-favorite girls in the entire world, and hanging out with your fiance's mom ... posing under a ginormous stripper statue. Yeah. I needed that drink!

 
Soon the 3 remaining ladies arrived and we were let in to the Showgirl Bar to sign waivers and pose for our official group photo. Thank goodness for the built in shorts on running skirts - I'd have been showing off a lot of my business had that not been there!!! At 10:30 we were escorted back to our classroom. It was pretty small, with a raised stage, cubbies for purses, animal print chairs lining the walls, and an adorable fireplace. *No pictures allowed, but if you need photos, check out their facebook page. I tried to hide in the corner, and was bullied into moving one seat over. So there I was, 2nd row, 3rd person in ... but that darn Bachelorette sash ... Almost immediately I was called up to the stage by our teacher, a former stripper, and told to sit.
 
10 am margaritas!
From there I pretty much got a lap dance - a lap dance of things you should NOT do, and tips on what TO do and lines to say to get money (or things from your husband, a new purse, perhaps?). So now humor me and imagine yourself on stage with 18 women looking at you, one being your mom and the other your future mother in law (an arms reach away from me!!!) ... and now picture that stripper using you, and then you accidentally touch her boob .... and the whole time your future MIL is cracking jokes. It would have been mortifying if it wasn't so damn funny and awesome!
Love 'em!!!
 Back at my chair we all stood up and started learning some seductive dance moves .... while describing them like normal activities (taking a shower, washing your leg, giving yourself a monthly breast exam). I was laughing so hard inside!!! I mean just in front of me is MF's mom spanking herself and to my left is my mom swiveling her hips around. What was going on?? We then incorporated the chair and had imaginary men seated while learning more moves. Again, lots of laughter, but as time went on we were all loosening up a bit. Once we completed the lap dance portion we moved on to the biggie .... the stripper pole!
 
New Sister-In-Law!!! :-)
I paired up on my pole with my new sister-in-law ... talk about an ice breaker when you are grinding on a pole while facing each other! We actually learned some moves that kept our feet on the floor, and turned those into one mini-routine. Then we became big girls -- and learned three different ways to spin around that pole with our legs off the ground. It was actually pretty darn cool! For the end of class it was a free-for-all of testing out all of our next moves while thinking of our stripper name.
 
Forget about R0nda Rae, you may now call me Dimple$! Don't believe me? Check my Stripper 101 graduate license!
 
Now THIS is how you do Vegas!!
But the day wasn't done! I naively thought I was going to meet up with MF and then just chill in Vegas until our show later that night. I was so wrong - and so glad I was!  I expected a group lunch somewhere (snooze) and instead was told by my future sister-in-law that I was being kidnapped. I was told to meet in the Miracle Mile Shops at Fat Tuesday to grab drinks on our way to the valet/taxi area. Apparently MF was in on this the whole time and kept it a secret, good boy! I was told we were going to take a limo down the Strip to see the sights. They left out a tiny detail..... we were picked up in a stretch Hummer, complete with thumping music, crazy lights, and stocked with beer and ice. The cherry on top? The sunroof!
 
For the next hour the three of us girls, (myself, future sister-in-law and the Best Man's girlfriend) drank, danced out of the sunroof, visited the Vegas sign, went up and down The Strip, practiced our new stripper moves, took tons of photos, got flashed by a bachelor party, and had an absolute blast!! It was something you only ever see in movies, except it was actually happening! They were so freaking sweet to steal me away and show me a great time! The funniest thing was AFTER the fact when texting with one of my very best friends .... he totally saw us without even knowing it was us screaming down the Strip!
 
Mike Tyson - take that, bodyguards!
At the end of our ride we hustled to the Miracle Mile again .... to see Mike Tyson! We weren't willing to fork over $180 for an 8 by 10 glossy and a chance for a photo, so instead I had to be stealth to snap a quick shot of him while 3, not one, not two, but THREE body guards kind of skootched me away. Really? Do the girls and I look THAT scary that Mike Tyson needs THREE guys moving me? Whatever, I saw Mike Tyson!
 
More drinks, shopping, and then our party was done. It was such a total blast! My life may never be the same after that!

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

P.S. I'm Married!!

Vegas happened.

I touched a stripper's boob.
I toured the Strip in a stretch Hummer with two freaking awesome girls that bride-napped me. We were hanging out of the sunroof while drinking and dancing just like a dream bachelorette party should be!
I lived off of PiƱa Coladas from Fat Tuesday.
I saw Mike freaking Tyson!!!
I indulged in glorious baths every day in the largest bathroom ever.
I was fed a strawberry at Zumanity.
I went on board Titanic on the 101st anniversary of the sinking.
I learned to pole dance.
I saw very dear friends and family.
I cried from every emotion.

I GOT MARRIED!!!!!

Sunday, April 7, 2013

The FINAL Wedding Update!!

Now don't get me wrong by looking at the title ... not the last wedding post, but just the last update before the wedding actually happens!

Things have been moving along swimmingly. I'm not even sure what "swimmingly" means, but I'm using it anyway.  One week from today I'll be having breakfast with MF and then meeting up with the girls, Jessica and Cilley Girl. While the boys are off doing who knows what - that better not involve naked chicks!!! - we ladies are hitting up the Mandara Spa at Planet Hollywood for my hair and make-up appointment. I've never had anyone actually do my hair and make-up for me for any event since I was a little girl in dance class. Finally I think I've settled on the hair style I want - down, yet kind of up and back so it's off my face, but totally NOT 90's prom hair. And along those lines, I need to call and schedule my pre-wedding spray tan. Hopefully no hand/feet disasters this time!

Right now my living room is filled with suitcases of all sizes. One bag is pretty much all wedding/bridesmaid dresses. My carry-ons will be full of important documents so that I CAN get married, jewelry and cameras. Oh, and the fedoras. Can't forget the fedoras! I think they take up a carry-on all on their own.

And so I'm blogging right now as a way of procrastinating on picking out the clothes I'll be wearing during the most epic of all Vegas weekends. Frankly, I'm pretty sure I'll be in running skirts the entire time. I'm consulting the weather report .... Oh man, four letter words just came out of my mouth!!

So, yeah, I'm sticking with running skirts! I will leave the Garmin and Adidas at home - but I think running skirts will help me survive the whole "oh my gosh I'm melting" thing that will be happening! Oh who am I kidding - MF and I have already planned on getting to Planet Hollywood, dropping bags off and then grabbing drinks while we wait for our limo to take us to the Marriage Bureau! We know how to do Vegas, dammit!

Anyway, point is - I am ready and super excited!!! I get to see friends that I haven't seen in years, and I get to be in my favorite place with a lot of my favorite people. How often do you really get to have your family and friends all together in Sin City?? My mom has been hearing about Mike, Clark and Bob for YEARS and now she gets to meet them. I might just bring them all back home to Oregon with me actually.

The last thing - which is what I told MF I was in here working on - is music. We get to pick what we enter to. I've done a little splicing and created our "wedding march". Now I am just picking out the song we will leave the chapel to. The production of the 'Zillas is all coming together -- and I promise to share once it's over!*   

*The reception, which is the even bigger "production" is 2 weeks after the wedding, so I'll drag this out like crazy! ;)

OMG, I'M GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!